Me, Myself and Reality

“I just want to be my self! ‘’

We heard it a lot as quote in a teenager like you guys. But, do you really know what  your sentence means? Or are you saying this because of trending topic among teenagers? Aahh, now I can see you guys hesitating... 

I’m asking you, how do you know you have found yourself? I say, if you have never felt connected to who you are, and what you want to find whatever makes you you, being yourself will be hard.

Let me tell you this, finding yourself is an enlightening experience. It is a time of harmony because you develop that belief system that will carry you throughout the rest of your life. When you love yourself and who you are, you will savor and enjoy both life’s pain and pleasure.

It is a good idea to be yourself, not only because everybody else is taken, but because trying to be anything else doesn’t usually get you very far. That’s the truth. You have to understand what you have unlearned about yourself. This process can be disheartening, as you remember past decisions where you had the chance to be yourself but instead chose to be something different.

Since trying to be anyone other than yourself is usually ineffective, why not begin by deciding to do only what is true to your own inner compass? If you did it for just one day, what would that day look like?

Being yourself is risky. Something could go wrong, and then whose fault it would be? Definitely yours. To avoid regret, you have to make active decisions. I think moving forward is better than remaining stationary. And I also think you have to show people you care about them—merely thinking nice things doesn’t help anyone.  Let go of the need to be loved by all and accept that some people still think you stink. 

Yet, it’s important to forget about what everyone else thinks because you cannot please everyone. Realize that some people are jealous, afraid, or overwhelmed when a person changes their usual habits and becomes more enlightened. It’s like a threat of changing relationship patterns and it can sometimes cause them to have to face their own foibles that they’ve been trying to escape. Give these people space and compassion, and they may come around in time. If they don’t, leave them be; you don’t need them to shore up your sense of self.

At the heart of finding yourself is believing and relying on yourself. If you don’t have a solid foundational sense of yourself, you will be inclined to listen to what others have to say all the time and to be swayed by their insistence on what is wrong, right, and appropriate. 
When the self sense of others envelops your own self sense, you’re caught up in the maze of otherness and you’re not likely to find yourself any time soon.

Start trusting your own judgment and decision-making processes. Sure, you’re going to make mistakes from time to time but so does everyone else,right? And it’s through mistakes that you will find yourself growing, learning, and reaching into your real sense of self. 

In the long-run, you know you’re capable of being a good self. You know you’re capable of taking the risk. Even if some people don’t understand, you can find a way to pursue the life and work you’ve always wanted. And you can be yourself, whoever you are, today.

Glossaries:

Enlightening (adj)            : mencerahkan

Disheartening (adj)          : menyedihkan

Stink (v)                         : tidak disukai

Overwhelmed (adj)         : kewalahan

Foibles (n)                      : kelemahan

To be swayed (v)            : terombang-ambing

Inclined (adj)                  : cenderung/condong